Douai

Oblate

October 2001

No 14

Oblate Formation

OBLATES are those who have been called by the Holy Spirit to live according to the Rule of St Benedict in their own home and work environment. They are attached to a monastery and are part of that particular monastic community. They have been called to live according to the Gospel and grow closer to Jesus Christ in this particular monastic way. The essential of this life is on-going conversion, prayer and work.

Formation is essential for all who enter into a monastic way of life. People have to be formed into way of living that St Benedict envisages. This formation is as important for oblates as for those who live in monasteries; it is a life-long process, but especially intense during the first, novitiate year. Above all else the novitiate year is designed to ensure that the novice ‘truly seeks God’.

The monastic indeed has the advantage of a novice mistress or master who day by day instructs the novice in the life she or he is undertaking in addition to being immersed in the living tradition. The oblate, however, is living in a secular environment. Indeed it could be argued that formation is all the more important for the oblate.

A few months ago a conversation took place on the Oblate Forum about formation. Some oblates regretted that their communities offered very little by way of formation or support. Formation was something of which everyone felt in need.

We need to improve the formation we offer our Douai oblates. Formation occurs during the retreats, but these are only four weekends a year and many are not able to be present at all the retreats. The novitiate year needs to be an especial time of formation. but the oblate does not live in daily contact with a novice master or mistress.

The Oblate Director of St Meinrad Archabbey, Fr Meinrad Brune OSB has devised a series of papers with questions for personal reflection for their oblate novices to work through during the course of the novitiate year. He has kindly allowed us to use them. So in future each oblate novice will receive a set of these papers and be asked to send their reflections to the oblate director by mail or as email attachments regularly during the novitiate year.

Fr Meinrad writes "In learning Benedictine spirituality, Oblate Novices are formed in keeping with the foundation and spirit of a specific Benedictine community". During the last retreat it was suggested that each oblate should have a ring binder in which papers issued at retreats and other handouts could be filed and become a resource for each oblate. This ring binder would become a personalised formation tool for each oblate novice. Simon Bryden-Brook has offered to oversee the production of ring binders and the basic contents for which we are very grateful. This will help us offer better formation.

St Benedict & Speech

THERE is no chapter in St Benedict’s Rule entitled Toleration, however that does not mean that the concept is foreign to him, quite the contrary.

Look for instance at the chapter on the abbot. He is told to show no favouritism, all are to be treated alike, but St Benedict continues "Use argument, appeal, reproof". This means that he must vary with circumstances, threatening and coaxing by turns, stern as a taskmaster, devoted and tender as only a father can be. (Rule II:23-24) The abbot has to adapt his approach to each person according to that person’s temperament and abilities. ..."directing souls, and serving a variety of temperaments, coaxing, reproving and encouraging them as appropriate. He must so accommodate and adapt himself to each one’s character and intelligence." (Rule II:31-32) So the abbot has to have unlimited tolerance.

Likewise of the cellarer St Benedict says "He should not annoy the brothers. If any brother happens to make an unreasonable demand of him he should not reject him with disdain and cause him distress, but reasonably and humbly deny the improper request." (Rule XXXI:6-7).

Such an attitude should be found in all followers of St Benedict, monastics and oblates alike. We must all be watchful of our speech, to make sure that any comments we may make in conversation or discussion cannot be interpreted by others, especially those to whom they are addressed, or about whom they are made, in a hurtful or disparaging way. Because someone’s opinion does not coincide with ours or because we can see the fallacy or illogicality of their point of view, that is no justification to comment in such a way that it can appear to make them feel small or be interpreted as a ‘put down’.

Similarly because someone is of different social or educational background from ourselves is no reason to consider them unsuitable to be part of our community. We are all responsible for our tongues. St James writes "...the tongue is a tiny part of the body but it is capable of great things. A small flame is enough to set a huge forest on fire. The tongue is a similar flame; ... Nobody can control the tongue; it is an untiring whip full of deadly poison. We use it to bless God, our Father, and also to curse those made in God’s likeness. From the same mouth come both blessing and curse." (James III 5-6, 8-10).

St James was using exaggeration to make the point that we must be very careful of what we say. Our words must be measured and carefully chosen. In all things charity must predominate, we are all responsible for our speech, we must think before speaking to ensure that other people, who may be weaker than ourselves, cannot be hurt by anything we say. If in doubt, keep silent. St Benedict wrote "Let us follow the Prophet’s counsel: I said, I have resolved to keep watch over my ways that I may never sin with my tongue.(Ps 39:2-3) ... because it is written: In a flood of words you will not avoid sin (Prov 10:19); and elsewhere The tongue holds the key to life and death (Prov 18:21). (Rule 6:1, 4-5). St Benedict certainly considered it better to say nothing than to say something hurtful.

Humilty and patience are virtues that St Benedict values. He teaches that monastics should show humility rather than self-importance and "They should each try to be the first to show respect to the other (Rom 12:10), supporting with the greatest patience one another’s weaknesses of body or behaviour, and earnestly competing in obedience to each other". (Rule 72:4-6) Tolerance for the person and the views and opinions of others is an important Christian virtue. By endeavouring to live this virtue we shall be true daughters and sons of St Benedict.

St Frideswide C680 - 727  Benedictine Saint

ST FRIDESWIDE was the daughter of Dida of Eynsham who ruled what is now west Oxfordshire under the over-lordship of the King of Mercia. He endowed several minster churches, among them one at what is now Oxford. This was a double monastery and he made Frideswide, who had taken a vow of perpetual virginity, the first abbess. The monastery was on the site of the present Christ Church Cathedral.

According to legend a certain Æthelbald intended to seduce her. She escaped to the forest of Bampton or another version says Binsey, and he was blinded, but was cured through her intercession.

Little else is known for certain about Frideswide. She died and was buried in her monastery at Oxford. The church and all the early records were destroyed when Æthelred II had the church set on fire with invading Scandanavians who had sought sanctuary there trapped inside.

In the 12th century the monastery was rebuilt as a house of Austin Canons. St Frideswide shrine was established and her bones translated in 1180 in the presence of the Archbishop Canterbury and King Henry II. In 1440 she was made the patron of Oxford University.

Cardinal Wolsey suppressed the monastery in 1525 to build and endow Cardinal College, now Christ Church, but the shrine was unhurt until Henry VIII had it destroyed in 1538. Queen Mary restored the shrine but it was destroyed again in 1558 and in 1561 a fanatical canon dug up St Frideswide’s bones. He deliberately mixed them with those of the Zwinglian, Peter Martyr Vermigli. Recently remains of the shrine have been discovered in a well and an attempt has been made to restore it.

Douai has St Frideswide in the house calendar because of a local connection. The little parish church at Frilsham, within our Catholic parish, is dedicated to St Frideswide and nearby in the woods, it is alleged, is St Frideswide’s well, which was associated with healing since medieval times. For along time a healing ministry was conducted in the church in which Fr Nicholas took part.

St Frideswide is also venerated at Borney in Artois as St Frevisse; how she came to be known there is a complete mystery.

Her feast is kept in our house calendar on October 19.

Oblate Directory

WITH this edition of the Newsletter you should receive a copy of the Oblates Directory. Apologies for not producing it earlier in the year. Please check it to make sure your entry is correct. If this is any error please let us know by email or letter so that the database can be corrected. Thank you.

Final Oblations & Enrollment of Novices

When applicants wish to apply to become oblate novices or novices wish to make their final oblation, it would be most helpful if they would please apply in writing or by email beforehand so that we can arrange a time when the monastic community is able to be present. If people do not ask until during the retreat, it does not really allow enough time to make the best possible arrangements for time and location.

Fr Matthew OSB

Retreats

The guest house is already fully booked for our next retreat in December, but during the last two retreats in July and September there were empty rooms in the guest house. May I suggest that next year those of you who can only come for one retreat a year should choose the June or September retreats rather than the December one.

In order to avoid disappointment for retreats booking should be made early and should be in writing or by email. I do not encourage phone calls or spoken requests as these can easily be forgotten. If there is a piece of paper it can be filed and the booking is not easily misplaced.

At the last retreat there were a number of last minute cancellations and ‘no shows’, which accounted for the empty rooms. We do not ask for a deposit for Oblate Retreats, as we do for all other retreats, but please, if you book, make every effort to come, as it is unfair on those who have been unable to get in. With this newsletter all those who have booked for the December retreat will receive a notification, which they are asked to return to confirm their booking.

The dates for 2002 retreats are: April 5 - 7, June 28 - 30, Sept 27 - 29, Dec 13 - 15. A booking form is enclosed herewith for your convenience.

Applicants

News

At the last Oblate Retreat in September Kathleen Ryan received the Sacrament of the Sick. She is due to undergo further surgery for cancer and we ask your prayers for her speedy recovery.

We are happy to record that Richard Cavanagh continues to make good progress after his by-pass surgery in the spring.

Steve Miller asks our prayers for his mother who died earlier in the year.

Please pray for Fr Jerome Gladman OSB, oblate director of Buckfast Abbey who died in October.

Late Additions

As it would be useful for you all to read this and think about the questions raised, I have copied it here by kind permission fo the Editor in Chief, Judith Sutera OSB. We will include at least one session at the December Retreat to discuss this and see how we can respond to the issues raised. If any of you, especially those who will not be able to be present, would like to write or email me beforehand with comments, I will ensure that they are made available to the meeting.

This supplement also allows room to print a letter from Simon Bryden-Brook that arrived too late for inclusion in the main newsletter.

Douai Oblate is the Newsletter for the Oblates of Douai Abbey. It is published at Douai Abbey, Upper Woolhampton, Reading, Berks, RG7 5TQ, phone 0118 971 5338, fax 0118 971 5303, e-mail douaiabby@aol.com 23.10.01

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Return to Oblates Page  : To Douai Oblate June 2001.

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Douai Abbey Registered Charity No. 236962

05/11/01(GH)

Gervase Holdaway OSB, Douai Abbey, Upper Woolhampton, Reading, Berks. RG7 5TQ